Depression was, fortunately, merely a temporary state of affairs ... .
Small wonder that neither of my husbands were ever able to figure out the rhythm of my life -- and I'm sure that my co-workers are as much at sea as they were.
Oh, the anger is still bubblin' under the surface, but it can no longer sneak up on me with such explosive force, and I'm again "in charge."
That I may need to take some time off is obvious, and I plan to factor that in within the next few weeks. I'd set a pace that was unsustainable, and every cell was/is vibrating! Memories of Freedom Summer '64 could not have brought me to such a dramatic halt -- as if hitting the proverbial wall -- had I not been running on empty for weeks. Lesson learned.
Need to look up our mutual friend, Dr. Hardy Frye. I now recall that the last time we met was at the graduation ceremony for black students at the University a few years ago. As I remember, he was having some health issues ... . why do we allow such friends to drift out of our lives? It was at that time that I was honored by the graduating class with the Fanny Lou Hamer Award, and Hardy had served on the selection committee, and was in the procession walking beside me soberly
black-robed and somber as his role demanded. To be honored by a graduation class of students who were total strangers was one thing -- impressive enough -- but to know that Hardy, a SNCC veteran of Freedom Summer '64, had participated in the class's choice ... was almost overwhelming.
All of that figured in to my temporary meltdown, of course, with that award and the experience of the graduation remembered against the images of Ms. Hamer's heroic plea for the seating of her delegation -- all played into the drama being relived over the past weekend.
Small wonder things would all come crashing down!